Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Kites ......

Ah, here I am with yet another film review…”Kites”. Got caught in New Delhi with nothing to do, I went to the Ambience Mall and there as I was flooded with brands and brands and just as I took the elevator to escape from emptying my purse, I landed on the top floor….PVR cinemas. Yet another dilemma started. Kites or “Shrek Forever and After”. But Hrithik Roshan had already stolen my heart with Dhoom II and so, “Kites” it was…With the likes of Hrithik Roshan and Barbara Mori in the cast and when Anurag Basu dons the direction, you walk in with an expectation that the kite would be really colourful and it would fly up and up but…For those of you who’d like to know the plot… Hrithik is a dance teacher and he also has a noble part time job… marrying immigrants to get them green cards. (If I were he, I would switch the part time to full time :-)). And then he strikes gold…a Las Vegas gambling club owner’s daughter Kangana Raut falls for him. And she flashes her thighs at him and Hrithik is more impressed by her car than her thighs (while it is the opposite for yours truly :-)) And here’s our man, trying to become the son in law of the billionaire , Kiran Bedi ( Now ageing has nothing to do with appearing smart …. Ask Kiran Bedi !) . And then there’s a brother of Kangana Raut who is about to marry a Mexican girl ( Barbara Mori). On seeing Barbara , Hrithik does two things ….A . He falls for her. B . He recalls that Barabara Mori was the latest immigrant that he had married. (ever heard of getting married and falling in love..This is it :-)) Barbara Mori agrees to spend the night before her wedding with Hrithik in a chaste and romantic way but Hrithik’s brother in law traces them. And then a mega escape starts spanning countries with the villain hunting for Barbara as if she were his gambling club license and he could not exist without her. And what follows is a series of car races (whichever model car he steals, Hrithik manages to drive them faster than the chasing sports cars …who says India hasn’t produced any F1 champion?). Then there’s a bank robbery, which is thrown in as an adventure, but I seriously suspect that it compensates for the lack of comedy track. And when they really attempt at comedy using the age old trick of fooling each other with false translation like “ Ullu Ki patti” standing for “ I love you” , you just laugh cos you don’t have anything else to laugh for. They reach Mexico and marry and try to have conjugal bliss but villain’s bullets hit at the right (???) time and the lovers get separated. ( Moral of the story : Never wait til you get married !!!). The film has too many flash backs that you have to take a diary along to keep track of which flash back you are in at that time. Anyway, the whole story is a flash back with Hrithik trying to find Barbara after the separation. He discovers she has killed herself by falling from a high cliff and he goes to the same cliff and falls from there. Now, for symbolism lovers, the Kites have come down. And as the kites come down, the screen comes down. And then we ask ourselves “Did these kites ever take off in the first place?”. And I have a big grievance against all these fellas from Bollywood to Kollywood…when you decide to get a foreign heroine, why is it that you always have to find such dumb looking girls ( right from Nadodi Thendral to Lagaan…) . Barbara Mori is a big disappointment as far as looks are concerned. . Hrithik is wasted in a stupid slow moving movie. And so is my money…..


  1. Really enjoyed reading your blog!

  2. Abhi,

    I haven't seen the movie yet... But your review was so funny and enjoyable. Very Good!


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